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What a journey! – Amanda’s story

Posted on September 20, 2009
Filed under: Breastfeeding beyond infancy (2 years +), Breastfeeding through pregnancy, Expressing, Low weight gain

Two years and three months after we began Layla has weaned herself. :) During our breastfeeding relationship she has always been a particularly prolific feeder and I often wondered how we would ever get there but after I became pregnant she cut down to two feeds in 24 hours. Then one day there was no milk and she quite happily accepted that she had drunk all the nummies and they would come back for the baby. I think she dealt with it better than me!

Before Layla was born I felt quite strongly that breastfeeding was natural and important but also thought that I had to get my head around the fact that it may not work for us. I think this came mainly from my sister having trouble and switching to ABM at three months with her first baby. Also because my Mum had bottle fed myself and one of my sisters. She fed my youngest sister for nearly 12 months though so I was hoping that I could do the same. I joined the Australian Breastfeeding Association (ABA) at the urging of my mentor yoga teacher and went to the breastfeeding class at the hospital to prepare. Deep down I wanted to make it to two years but was outwardly preparing for the possibility that I may not.

After Layla was born we were left to ourselves for a couple of hours and she eventually made her way to the breast about an hour after birth. She was smallish at 2.7kg but apart from having no idea what to expect I thought we were doing pretty well. About two days after birth it was recommended that she be comp fed due to jaundice and weight loss while in hospital. She had one cup, 30ml, before it clicked to me that I could be using my own milk. No-one suggested to me that we could use EBM to comp her feeds though so I’m very thankful that I knew enough to suggest it myself. The comping was recommended by a paediatrician who had not even seen her! I was able to access an electric pump in hospital and don’t think I had to worry about storage because it was used within a short time frame. Before leaving hospital I called my local ABA group and organised to pick up a pump on the way home. Once home I continued to pump for a few days but had to return to hospital due to high blood pressure. This was within the first week of being home so I continued pumping in hospital. Once home I continued breastfeeding and giving EBM sporadically.

During the first three weeks, on top of my extra time in hospital, we had grandparents and family visiting from interstate. At the time I didn’t think much of this but in hindsight can see that it affected my establishment of feeding. As well as feeling unsure about breastfeeding and doing it in front of people there were family dinners that we attended and lots of visitors. I can clearly remember thinking we were in a hurry so she could have one breast now and one when we got there. Two years later she still liked to have both sides at a feed so that was never going to work for her! When the MACH nurse visited at three weeks Layla had only gained 50g in 11 days bringing her to 2.6kg so had not regained her birthweight. I was devastated at this visit to hear the nurse refer to Layla as ‘scrawny’ when she rang to book us into the Day Stay Clinic. I called the breastfeeding helpline several times during this period which gave me ongoing reassurance but the most helpful thing I was told was to feed and feed and feed! The counsellor shared her experience with me and suggested I try feeding at least two hourly, basically trying to do nothing but feed for a week and see what impact that had at the next weigh in. So I set myself up on the couch with the phone, fruit, water each day as I worked my way through a DVD boxset of my favourite show. When she was next weighed at four weeks there had been a gain of 120g. For the next couple of months we went through weekly/ fortnightly weighs and Layla continued to have consistent but small gains. During this time her length increased steadily at about 1cm per week and head circumference also increased. She stayed under the third percentile until nearly six months at which point she continued to gain weight in the same pattern until she reached close to the fiftieth at nine months. This then steadied out again and she has been tracking along happily at about the thirtieth percentile ever since. I froze the excess expressed milk in ice cube trays then stored them in labelled bags. It meant that I always had some on hand and came in handy for adding to solids when the time came.

Layla It was a tough time with quite a few times when I questioned my ability to feed her, questioned my confidence in breastfeeding and felt that it was all too hard. Positioning and attachment became the centre of my world and I developed an understanding of the let down reflex and how the breast works that I only thought I’d learnt about before Layla was born. I can clearly remember the day at about three months when I realised that we had just latched on easily and naturally without stepping through the positioning and attachment process. It was finally starting to become easy! My husband’s support during this time was crucial as he had faith in me and my ability to give Layla everything she needed.

We initially tried to introduce solids at around six months but Layla wasn’t particularly keen. She was fed on demand so I didn’t push it then at nearly eight months it clicked. We were having dinner one night when she made it very clear that she was keen to join in. Lots of banging, reaching and squealing! At that meal she at two bowls of mash with veg and never looked back. It didn’t affect her milk intake though. She continued to have about eight feeds during the day, usually two to four feeds between her bedtime and ours as well as feeding overnight two to four times. A total of up to 16 feeds in 24 hours. Around the time she started walking at 14 months Layla upped her feeds even further… She was feeding frequently day and night, up to 20 times in 24 hours. I’m sure it was more some days but I didn’t want to think about it. We discussed night weaning many times and thought about making changes but she seemed to need it and it all seemed too hard when I was so tired. Trying different things like going to bed with Daddy didn’t work either as she just wouldn’t stand for it. She wanted her nummie noo’s and that was that. I was at the point where I could hardly cope with it but kept telling myself it would pass.

At some point during this time her eye teeth both came through together and she stopped feeding for three days. I had no idea as my parenting had so heavily relied on breastfeeding until then. I was totally bamboozled going from all to nothing. Although I found information on how to manage breast refusal in smaller babies none of it seemed to apply to her as she had obviously stopped due to pain. She was still having the odd small feed and I expressed to avoid blocked ducts. We went to visit a friend who is a counsellor one day and I was in tears. Then as suddenly as it stopped she started again. Much easier to deal with than the alternative! We kept rolling along with her feeding day and night. Layla has always increased her feeds before any developmental changes and she had so much going on at that time that I figured it had to end some time. And it did.

Amanda and Layla By eighteen months Layla was sleeping for 4-5 hour chunks between 6pm-6am and started to sleep in her own bed in our room. When she was nearly two we moved house and she moved into her own room. She was really excited about having her own bed and over the next few months started sleeping through most nights. I also had a miscarriage around this time and felt that she needed to drop some feeds during the day so we got down to about five a day. By the time she turned two, about the same time as I got pregnant, we were only having between 6-8 breastfeeds in 24 hours which steadily declined over the past three months. It has now been two weeks since her last feed which was a lovely snugly morning feed in my bed. I feel blessed to have enjoyed such a wonderful experience with her and to have reached my goal of two years. I also made some wonderful supportive friends who share an appreciation for the magical experience of breastfeeding and were with me every step of the way.

Filed under: Breastfeeding beyond infancy (2 years +), Breastfeeding through pregnancy, Expressing, Low weight gain

Comments

One Response to “What a journey! – Amanda’s story”

Charndra from Part Time EC on September 27th, 2009 7:46 pm

Hi Amanda,
it has been wonderful to read your story as a finished breastfeeding journey!

How cool that Layla’s weaning was so easy and mutual and you have that nice break before your new baby comes along.

Congratulations on your achievements, you should be so proud of persisting through those hard stages. Layla is SUCH a cutie pie and such a healthy little cherub.

Maven still calls her “Layla of the Big Blue Eyes”, LOL.

Charndra